This Thirty Things About Me Challenge is really getting to the heartstrings and having me delve into a lot of areas that are difficult for me to talk about. I am finding that writing about these things is actually cathartic though. It is somewhat therapeutic for me to write about these things instead of keeping them inside.
One of these subjects is my relationship with my parents. Asking a question like “what is my relationship with my parents like” is a loaded question and one that has many answers.
First, my relationship with my mother.
My parents divorced when I was young and during the divorce, my mom picked me up and moved me 4 hours away. Because of this, my mother had primary custody of me during my childhood.
Growing up my mother and I didn’t get along. We were always fighting. We fought about the unfair treatment between my brother and I and our step-brother. We fought about chores, and stupid rules.
As I grew older, we fought more. When I was 16 years old my mom had my youngest brother. I was forced to babysit him all the time and we fought over this. I often would tell my mom that I am not the one who had a child and I should be able to be a teenager.
My mom even tried to break my husband and I up when we were dating by grounding me for a month. He had graduated high school so I didn’t get to see him and she didn’t think he would stick around.
I kept secrets from my mom. I never wanted to, but I never thought she would see my side of things. She was very strict and I felt that if I was honest with her she would just punish me.
Once I moved out of the house though, my relationship with my mom greatly improved. I think we just were not meant to live together. My mom and I are closer than ever now. I am glad that we are closer, but I wish we didn’t fight so much when I was younger.
Then, my relationship with my dad.
My relationship with my dad was completely different than my relationship with my mom. My dad and I were always close and I never kept secrets from my dad.
I think part of this is because he never treated me like I was a child. I was forced to grow up quickly because of my situation. I was often home alone after school with my brother. I have always been very mature for my age, and my dad respected that.
He didn’t keep secrets from me and I didn’t keep secrets from him. I know things about my dad that most kids would never know about their parents, and I respect that he was always so open with me.
When I started dating my husband he didn’t try to scare him off, but instead he embraced him and just told him as long as he treated me right then he didn’t have an issue.
My dad and I are surprisingly close for two people who rarely get to see each other.
My relationship with my parents is completely different than most people think, but I wouldn’t change my current relationship with my parents for anything.
How is your relationship with your parents?